One Smile

We had our graduation ball yesterday. So, that's done. The next highlight of my life would be sunday, when I finally graduate after 19 years of education. It's really a big deal, as far as I'm concerned. I had dresses specially made for both last night and my graduation, had my hair and make-up planned a week in advance, reserved a bar for my graduation blow-out with my friends and went out of my way to get extra tickets to my graduation for my nanny and the driver who's been with us for so many years.


Anyway, here's something I'd like to do: I want to make a conscious effort to make at least one person smile every single day.


I went to this fastfood joint earlier today to buy an ice cream cone (note: my snail-paced race to weight-loss actually does not allow this, but it was so hot out and I had so many errands to do that involved walking under that hot sun). There were a couple of service lanes but only one that was open, though there were other people milling about behind the counter. I was standing in line waiting for my turn when this one dude behind the counter asks if he could man one of the registers and got my attention. He was not dressed as one of the crew so I could only guess that he's either an intern (though he looks too old to be one) or more likely an employee from corporate HQ.


This person really made me laugh. Granted he looks good but that was merely a plus. On a hot day, he just had so much energy and enthusiasm for his task, though he had no idea what buttons to press to punch in my order. And when I was hving difficulty zipping up my bag, he took back my ice cream cone so I could finish what I was doing, all the while giving advice on which side of the ice cream I should eat first. To add to that, he kept on trying to speak in straight Filipino just like the other crew but had to keep switching to English to get his point across -- I always find the effort entertaining.


I left that restaurant feeling a lot less bothered by the heat, and I bet he didn't even consciously try to do that. So thank you, cute random person, you made my day a bit more bearable. So here's what I'm going to do. I'm going to finally try my hand at writing again. I have a month left before review formally starts and I'm sure if I sleep less I could find time for it amidst all my other activities. I'm not yet sure in what way I'm going to write it, or how I'll share it to the world, but I'm going to get started.


As soon as I finish with this graduation craziness.

The Reason Why

So...

A month after college, a few days before graduation, and I have a new blog. Do I have time for this? No. So... why?

Here's a silly question: would you rather be lonely or alone? To most people, I guess there really isn't much difference, but there is for me. Personally, I savor the feeling of being alone. Not that I hate company, but sometimes being around too many people overwhelms me. I'm usually in my element either when I'm in the water, alone in my own bedroom (which I no longer have) or in a private corner of a cafe. Not that I can't deal with crowds, I love dressing up, partying and dancing the night away. But awkward conversations and forced interactions are truly not my thing.

But I digress. What I'm simply trying to say is, I enjoy being alone, but loneliness is another matter. And at this point in my life, loneliness has become a constant companion. It's come to the point that I can no longer explain to my friends or folks what it is I'm feeling, because I don't think they would even understand.

In a nutshell, I made this blog because I needed someone to talk to and something to keep me sane. So help me, internet.