Life is difficult enough without having to bend for others all the time.
24 August 2014
There are very few people in the world who I can truly say I am fully comfortable with. I could probably count those people in one hand, give or take an extra finger. They're the select few who I never get tired of, with whom I never have to make up excuses so that I can have some much needed space. They understand my need to be alone and when I need their support. So when I do find such people, I treasure them immensely.
23 August 2014
You turned me into somebody loved.
When I was young, I dreamt of running away with you and having you adopt me as your real daughter. For a little girl who always felt neglected and ignored, who couldn't understand why her parents are hardly ever around, you were safety and home. Your simple love was the one thing I never had to work hard for, never needed to ask for, never begged for. With you, I never had to put up pretenses. I didn't need to win any pageants, top any exams, or accumulate any talents. You were proud of me because I was your kindest alaga, and that was the ONE thing I was always proud of.
The past weeks have been difficult, and I always feel like I'm drowning. But I'm soldiering on. I'm going to keep doing the things I don't have to do to make you even prouder of me. I'll take care of my parents and I'll raise my siblings well, just like you taught me.
If there is a heaven, rest well and give my regards to our family and friends there. Someday, I'll find you again.